Both of these life lessons were given by my husband to my three-year-old just this morning.
THWACK! (followed by maniacal toddler laughing)
Hubs: And that's how we defeat the enemy. We smash their fists with our face.
Then, about an hour later, this came from the bathroom:
CRASH! (followed by more maniacal toddler laughing)
Hubs: And that's why we don't breakdance in the shower.
This is, indeed, my life.